I feel so tired and sleepy. Sugar slump? Who knows. Want to be at home, asleep – not in work. Sleep, sleep, sleep – all that's going through my mind. So – do I go home sick? Do I stay and suffer? The usual things won't work. Can't go for a walk cos of the ankle, plus I've fallen over once already today. PT tonight? Want to go – maybe do sitting down session? I'll ask Toby.
I'm trying to think of someplace quiet I could go away from people, just to chill out. Close my eyes even. So tired. I'm not really tired, just sleepy and sluggish, but I want to lie down and close my eyes. I should go out and get some fresh air but that's difficult with the walking. Some nice cold water would be nice too but again – need to walk.
Some hours later I think I've figured out the problem. I'm bored doing what I'm doing in work & dragging my feet doing it. So I need to think of a way to get around this. Ideally I'd log in from home, blast on some music and trudge on through them. One by one by one. I think I need to take another look at how to approach it all. Maybe X per day or something. I'll see. I will have to do something cos otherwise it's not worth it. Well I won't be doing my job... ... ... and I kinda need to keep on getting paid.
The walk on Saturday told me a few things.
1. My fitness is not what if could be.
2. I can do a lot when I push myself.
3. It's easier to keep going when there's people around.
4. I need to socialise more.
So fitness I can tackle. That will be ok eventually. I can use the Holiday Challenge on wlr to get going in the next 6 weeks. That will be 6 bouts of exerciuise per weeks which will be my 3hrs. Go me. It will also help me push myself some more as well. I've got the aerobics and toning outfits sorted now this week – I just need to stick to the plan.
Other people – this is though. I've got a full social calendar for the next few months and I'm going to be knackered. So I will have to manage this carefully. Most of it will be ok. Just need to remember driving is tiring is & off itself.
Money is an issue again. In total, I'm £18k in debt. That's half a yrs wages. I'm wondering if I need to refinance and consolidate again and then cut up the cards. If I pay off everything as I've planned, I will be debt free by October 2012. But that includes NO wedding money. None. It doesn't include any money for training or anything else. This is all debt I can pay back eventually, it's not a problem, but I very much want to be a saver not a borrower.ll debt I can pay back eventually, it's not a problem, but I very much want to be a saver not a borrower.
Since I've moved to Salisbury, I've been spending well beyond my means so now the time has come to reign it back in again. Things like clothes and books can be put on the back burner. I don't need any more. In fact I need to sort through what I've got and have a clear out. Maybe I can sell some things. Most important is to make sure everything is cash and start denying myself things again. A lot of things – big expenses for the year – are already paid for. Flights etc are sorted until Christmas. Al and I planned on holiday for November – maybe it will be a local one rather than a foreign one.
Food. I'm spending a lot no food. Thankfully I'm not throwing much out anymore, but it's noticeable I'm spending more again. A bit more effort needed here - not sure how yet, but there will be ways I suppose. I can start doing things in bulk again – empty out the freezer, use what's in there instead of buying new. Actually that will be the first thing –assess what's in the freezer and parcelling it out. Job for tonight? Look at budget meals – break out student cookbook again and start getting cheaper cuts of meat etc. Plan food for the week and not just Mon-Thurs. Use up food currently in the house.
So where does it leave me now?
I'm not sure.
Things I want.
1. I want to be debt ree.
2. I want to be fit and healthy.
3. I want to be solvent.
So, now I make it happen. No more buying on ebay, amazon,waterstones. I will only buy in cash. Check out charity shops, use the library (has the added bonus of walking there and back therefore helping money and fitness) Only buy enough food for me week at a time – should be £25 or less – plan menus to account for this.
Some things go together. For me, weight loss and money saving go together. Now I know I can survive on £50 a week bare basics (petrol & food). That means £200 a month no sundries. I can lower that down. £50 on ebay alone last month. £50! I can take up knitting again for presents etc. I think Ma would love to see me doing things like that. I can make presents not buy them. An extra £200 a month would have me debt free for the wedding. It would also have me at mere 'overweight' rather than 'obese' for the wedding. Possibly even 'normal' – wouldn't that be great?? So now I have to do it. I need a visual representation to guide me – excel chart? Getting organised and seeing how I'm progressing will only help things I think.
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